becoming older than 10 years old was the biggest mistake of my life
opens window curtains, takes 50 selfies in natural light, closes window curtains
when you’re in a bad mood and your friend is trying to cheer you up
Fun shark attack facts:
- In 1996, toilets injured 43,000 Americans a year. Sharks injured 13.
- In 1996, 2,600 Americans were injured by room fresheners. Sharks injured 13.
- In 1996, buckets and pails injured almost 11,000 Americans. Sharks injured 13.
- For every human killed by a shark, humans kill approximately two million sharks.
- Humans are assholes.
- Sharks are not assholes.
- Apparently everyone in 1996 lived in a real-life infomercial.
lollipops are so weird youre literally swallowing your own flavored saliva